Tuesday. Tuesday needs a name. Wednesday is hump day, thursday "well it's almost the weekend!" and Friday has cliche's attached to it and Monday has all the "Good God it's..." stuff attached to it. But tuesday? Nada. I propose Tuesday become "dry hump day". You know not as good as a "hump" but better than nothing. I don't know.
But this I do know. The best racket to be in this day and age is to be at a university and to do a funded "study". You hear these on the news nearly daily now. The airhead reporter informs you that a new Harvard study shows "that over-eating and lack of exercise do indeed lead to weight gain and obesity". Really! After all these years somebody found out why we are fat!! Hooray!
Oh and according to one the other day I heard did you know that smokers tend to have decreased lung capacity? Get out of town!
But the best one ever was in the news just a few months ago. A professor at the University of Wisconsin (or something close to that, I know I should be more prepared before I rant)actually got the US government to plunk down millions on a study testing the amount of arousal female college students derived from watching porn. This man is my God. Now that is what I call a day at the office! Had I ever conceived that such a living was possible, I would have worked until I was a Doctor of something. Man!
Doctor or not, I have an idea I am going to pitch to the government to get funding for. I want to study to see if binge drinking makes an 18-29 year old female more likely to take her top off. I think my study could lead to a new warning label on alcoholic beverages. It could be right there beside the driving and pregnancy stuff. ***may lead to taking off your top and in front of large concert crowds please use caution***. But without my study we'll never know. I think Mardi Gras 2004 is the perfect venue for me and my crack-smoking staff to start. I am working on the prospectus as we speak. I would have likely had an easier time during the Clinton years, but with George W.'s daughters being ones who like to booze it up a bit, he may have interest in the research.
Wish me luck.