There was an incident at work Friday.
I have previously mentioned a female co-worker who while beautiful in all the right superficial ways, has the most grating voice and accent, as well as not being the sharpest tack in the box.
She's not dumb at all, mind you. But everything is black and white. There is no outside the lines coloring for her. Everything goes over her head. And the accent, I love a cute girl with a southern accent like you can't imagine. This is beyond that pale however. You know the accent of someone in a shack in a swamp in Missisippi or something? That would sound cosmopolitan. If she just didn't speak she'd be breathtaking.
Anyway, She works with me fairly often. On Friday I made a cutish flirty little comment. She replied to someone else standing there "He is so cute and yummy I just want to bite his neck" (the word bite mind you lasted about 10 minutes in her drawl.) What the ....? That's kind of aggressive you know?
I was filled with so many conflicting emotions it was freaky. First of all, on the surface visually this is kind of arousing. However THAT voice and the way the words sounded! The bizarre mixture of arousal and nausea was mind- numbing. And for a second I thought "this is what it feels like to be a woman"...
That issue aside, think about if it had been I that said that to a female and not the other way around. Yep, I'd have a lawsuit slapped on me or something.
But if I brought a lawsuit? Oh, it would go to court probably. But who would not snicker at a guy who had a problem with an attractive woman making a statement like that.
(fade to a court room in north georgia)
The jury is seated, the honorable judge Mary Man-hater walks in. All rise!
The charges are read. The defendant an adorable little southern belle smiles her winning smile at the jury. "and the claim is the defendant threatened to bite the neck of this young man..."
The court is filled with whispers of "nancy boy" as they point at me and stare.
The jury not only doesn't find in my favor, they make me pay for putting this lovely young lady through all this stress.
Double standard I tell you, double standard!
I feel so cheap and dirty and used, like I'm just a piece of meat when I walk past that area now.
Yeah, yeah, I ,uh...like the feeling.