ahhh that's better.
Just got my hair chopped to proper summer weather spike-iness length. It's sticking up every friggin where.
Hair cutter Jessica was not in her usual run-on sentence mode. Her 7-month old has decided to scream all night out of the blue apparently cutting into her sack time. So she was more like choppy sentence chick this time.
"I let her cry for a while......but we HAVE to get sleep.....SEX? What's that?
When's your......vacation"?
I then proceeded to the MegaMart to get a few groceries and a denta-bone dealio for the dog. Whenever I shop there is bound to be an irritating theme in operation. Today's was "stand in the middle of the fucking aisle talking to my long lost friend I just happened to bump into and we totally block the aisle while we recount our glorious lives". I mean they should post fliers of the irritating theme du jour so we could all participate! Luckily I had few items to buy so was only blocked by three such touching reunions.
After fighting for my food items, I spied an express lane for "10 items or less" fairly wide open. Having a mere five items, I, surely with a gleam in my eye, be-bopped my happy ass right on up there.
However two rather ummm. portly ladies had decided to circumvent the proper protocol by breaking up their purchases into two seperate transactions. Though I believe each still exceeded the posted limit. The scam included using the ATM card and then passing this same card to her companion! While I applaud mildly the attempt at creativity here, I mean come on, what the fuck is that? I just picture them sitting at home (okay I'm just going to say it HOME = MOBILE HOME PARK) watching Maury and planning this brilliant plan for the grocery store while eating cheetoes and frozen pizzas and gulping down Mountain Dew (this I gather from the copius amounts of each purchased). Of course neither Einstein descendant appeared to have mastered the fine art of the ATM card. The subtle nuances of this complicated transaction seemed to escape these cranially-challenged lasses. The Check Out Superintendant (so said "Scott's
' tag)had to come around and help each.
Therefore this easy little escapade took me approximately 10 minutes to get through. This also proves my famous and incredible talent for having the most screwed up luck in check out lanes. I challenge anyone in this arena. Anyone!
Onward into the gentle evening I must now descend.