They grow up so damned fast don't they?
Well, my dog that is. Time was when she was a mere pup that after a whole weekend of hanging out like this past weekend, it was hell to leave on Monday morning. I'd get the most mournful pitiful "you gotta be f'ing kidding me man!" look from her. It hurt to see her sad little puppy face so apparently heartbroken.
Not so anymore. Now after a whole weekend with me she is ready for me to leave already dammit. She doesn't get her usual 20 hours a day of sleep with me banging and clanging around. She crashed last night during the Super Bowl and barely moved all night. This morning when I went over to make sure she was still alive, I got a blood shot, weary eye, only open a quarter of the way glaring at me.
"Nik you gotta go outside before I leave".
Bleary eye twitches slightly and a snort is directed my way.
So I go on with my breakfast and my leaving routine. Only the breaking out of food gets her off her doggie bed. She slinks towards the kitchen and lays down to get a view of what I'm doing. After she's convinced I've not accidentally dropped anything on the floor, she saunters back to bed.
Now, I've got to leave so I do the one thing she can't ignore. I open the door and go out myself. I'm outside in her domain! This brings her out and while she's out she decides nature can take it's course.
She comes back in and in the old days would have been at my heels hoping against hope to leave with me. Now?
"Alright Nik I hate to do it, but I gotta leave girl, I'll be back soon though!
"Yeah, yeah guy who feeds me that's great (yawn) can you turn that dam light out then."
"Okay, girl, you know I'll miss ya, you be good today okay?"
"whatever guy. how about shutting off the annoying tv and leave already then."
"alright then I'm outta here!"
(snort) "dear gawd a dog can't even sleep around this place anymore"...
"oakey doakey, have a good one!"
"don't let the door hit you in the ass then guy...geezus. humans..."
And also it must be mentioned I guess if this is an accurate record of my thoughts, but am I the only person who is not only not offended by some Janet boobage but who is dissapointed I couldn't see it better? I can't find another soul save myself, who thought it was anything but a travesty. A nice boob shot is never a travesty people! Lighten up!
Or light up.
But travesty, you want travesty?!?!?! (the tirade alert system is thus activated)
If somehow Kid Rock was relevant for ohhh three months or whenever that one hit he had was on the radio, seven years later who the hell cares? He can't sing, he gave Pam Anderson hepatitus, he looks like walking hepatitus, wouldn't you imagine he smells bad, he can't sing and I'm just gettin' warmed up. I suppose he's become the new white trash icon to take over for Hank Jr. or the fifth re-incarnation of Lynrd Skynrd or maybe Assload Rose of Guns-n-roses. Well just keep his stank ass singing at State Fairs or wherever thank you very much.
And I am too modest to bring it up, but were I not so modest I'd mention that anyone taking my betting advice on the game is now rich.