This is the sort of daily email exchanged with my co-workers that has me sucking on a .44 and spinning the cartridge all day. EVERYONE by now should know my distaste for cliches!
This person is so irritatingly upbeat and insane that she must be on some good drugs. Damn her.
To: Gutterpoet
From: Irritating Co-worker.
Yeah, I see where you're coming from and you're right. But it's been my experience that you catch more flies with honey than vinegar:):)
To: Irritating Co-worker
From: Gutterpoet
You may indeed, catch more flies with honey, but it's been MY experience that it is much more satisfying to smash the bejeebus out of the fly against the window with a fly-swatter and laugh when you see the guts smeared across the glass. Therefore, no need for any condiment whatsoever to draw any flies.
To: Gutterpoet
From: Irritating Co-worker
OH MY GOD! YOU ARE SOOOO FUNNY!
See I know you were joking! :)
But to your point, if we all tried to "put a smile" in our voice, others will respond with a smile right back, no matter what the situation. Surely you see that!
To: Irritating Co-worker
From: Gutterpoet
Yes, I'm so funny I often wet myself with my own hilarity. I'm not sure I am capable of putting a "smile in my voice" and the thought gags me, to be honest. I can easily put a lot of saliva in my voice, but that is lost over the phone usually or on the phone itself I should say.
Sometimes you see, violence really is the answer.
Have a slap-happy day!
To: Gutterpoet
From: Ever more irritating Co-Worker
LOL! LOL!
:):)
It's like I'm at a comedy club!
Thank you for the chuckles :):)
Luckily I know you are joking or I would be worried!
You're a trip.
I ALWAYS have a happy day, thank you:):)