Fellini Day [ 2004-07-13, 7:42 a.m. ]

Maybe it's just my own oft' cloudy and mostly warped brain but there will be one day every week or two that just has this Fellini-like, weird dream, drug flashback aura about it. Does anyone know what I mean? Today is that day.

While waiting for the dog to stick her nose in the bottom glass pane of the back door, which signals the end to her ritualistic morning back yard activities, I flipped through channels as I sipped my coffee. First, I encountered this weird independent film ("weird" before the words independent film might seem to be a redundancy, but in this case it merely amplifies what is already a given) a strange half documentary style, half mock-home movie style offering about a couple who only feels pleasure and love when beating the crap out of each other. It featured this very zoned out looking chick who likely weighed 70 pounds soaking wet and also had a Carrot Top quality about her which is so disturbing on so many levels it could be a skyscraper. At one point she sang this little song to the tune made popular by the obvious child molesting dinosaur Barney. "I slap you, you slap me, we're a sado-masochistic family". This song, gentle diary, is stuck in my head and making me want to climb a tower with an AK-47 and start offing people. I now long for the original version at this point. How bad is that?

Next was a film noir in which a distraught guy was holding a gun to his head yelling "my life was a lie, my life was a lie". Then blammo.

Dude! Let's face it. Really now all our lives are pretty well a patchwork quilt of half-truths and white lies. I am certainly closer in practice to George Constanza than I am Honest Abe Lincoln. From a little fib to a fetching young lass at 3am to questions about the size of someones' posterior, I have, as I like to call it, not outright lied but sort of rearranged the truth.

"Do you like my haircut?" You say, "sure" or "looks nice". You don't say "My God you can't go in public like that, you look hideous! I'm not being seen with you and your circus clown feak hair!" I submit that without these little fabrications we couldn't have a peaceful society. Total 100% honesty would have us all fighting unmercifully in the streets. So, sure this mans life was a lie. But, so what, I say.

On the side of a road I saw a 'possum. Not dead, not running. Just sitting and watching in the growing morning light. An evolved member of his species obviously trying to figure this traffic thing out.

A car had a bumper sticker that said "It's a Jesus thing, you wouldn't understand". What? What a wonderful crusader for your religion you are bucko. I found the Lord and peace and happiness, but the rest of you are SOL.

See what I mean?

I now move on and await the next oddity Fellini Day has in store for me.

last - next

4 - 2006-07-04

The bacon rebellion - 2006-06-25

scattergories - 2006-06-19

once more into the breach boys - 2006-06-05

not so famous last words - 2006-01-06

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