I have of late noticed something very disturbing. I guess I've always heard it was true, but recently I've really began to wonder why...
Old men have no asses.
None! That's why their pants are worn up to the chest. I bet if it wasn't for the crack, you'd not be able to recognize it was an ass.
I find this startling. (I guess the fact I'm looking at old men's asses itself might be a bit startling as well) Because indeed one day (god willing and the crick don't rise) I will be an old man. Will I have no ass at all? Where the hell does it go?
Of the things I am complimented on by the female species, my ass is high on the list. I can't afford to lose that!
Alright, so maybe it's some years away. Still I'd better start doing extra squats or something.
I suppose I could always get butt implants in the future.
I'll admit I've not really noticed too much, but it seems like my Dad hasn't fallen into the No Ass Syndrome yet. Maybe it's hereditary or something.
I can only hope.
Cause I gotta have some booty goin' on...